Meg asks:
I have (almost) 18 month-old twins. They still nurse once a day...which I shope to be stopping soon. My question is, they wake at least once a night to nurse. They will NOT go back to sleep without nursing and will stand and scream in their cribs, waking our other two children in the process. How can I help them get through the night? How do I know they aren't hungry?
Meg,
Start by taking the question about eating in the middle of the night to your pediatrician. Most kids are fine going all night without additional calories at 18 months, but I'd ask just to be sure that there's no medical need for a night feeding.
Once you have the go ahead to wean them at night, make sure you have a soothing bedtime routine that doesn't end with nursing them to sleep. If you nurse them to sleep, that's going to be the only way they know to fall asleep, and they'll need you at every night waking! Also, make sure you are choosing a developmentally appropriate bedtime. At 18 months, the average child needs 13.5 hours of sleep, with at least 11 hours at night (Note - this is the actual time sleeping, not the time in the bed!). In most families, this means that bedtime is between 7 and 8 pm.
For the middle of the night wakings (and for falling asleep at bedtime too if this is an issue), I really like the "Sleep Lady Shuffle" as a way to gradually decrease your role in putting the child to sleep and increase their role in falling asleep on their own. You start out right next to the crib, and you move your chair every few days until they are doing it on their own! It may get worse before it gets better, but you should see the boys putting themselves to sleep at night and the disappearance of the night wakings in 7 to 10 days!
